Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 61

Hot & Cold

Same gist. The first part is for buildup and character development, so if you’re only here for the sex, hit CTRL+F and enter “SEX STARTS HERE” or scroll down to that. Cheers! Please leave comments/critique!

Snowflakes fell from the sky periodically, but few and far between. The air was chilled and not a soul was in sight. All in all, it was a typical yet lonely winter scene.
My teeth chattered as I clung my skeleton-like fingers to the wheel, mumbling something about her being damn lucky. I was on the way to visit an old friend who recently went through a tough break-up. I hadn't ever tal... Continue»
Posted by soniclemon 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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"Mostly" Ghostly: The Summarised Ending

I've written myself into a corner with this story and can't seem to find a way out so here's the plot in a nutshell.

Jack and Regan continue to grow closer and eventually fall in love. Regan wants so desperately to be with Jack that she attempts suicide by overdose. Jack sees what he's doing to Regan and decides to leave so she can move on.

Two years later Regan is now Engaged to a man she met at work named Kyle.

Jack is a wandering spirit who suddenly finds himself drawn back to town. It turns out that he wasn't dead at all just a disembodied spirit. When they pull the plug on his... Continue»
Posted by Johnny_Lee_Miller 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Fuckn My Flat 2



My hands were shaking at the anticipation, she grabbed the back of my neck and brought me in for another deep kiss, my fingers danced lightly over the mounds of her boobs grazing the hard nipples as my hand got closer to her glistening thighs. I moved my hands over her pussy lips. Wet doesn’t even get close to describing her. This girl was hot and dying for some hard cock to make her scream. Her back arched as I lightly moved her wet lips apart, her panty gusset was soaked through with it as I dragged them off her, her ass raising in the air to help giving me a waft of her pu... Continue»
Posted by salahgabr 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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First Time Stories : Just One Look



So, about a year ago, I had a lot of trouble going to sl**p one Thursday night. I was tossing and turning for hours, but I just couldn't fall asl**p! At around 2 in the morning, I realized that the reason I couldn't go to sl**p was because i hadn't exercised in two days - I go to the gym at least five times a week - so I had a lot of pent up energy. I like to keep in good shape, and so far, I've succeeded. I'm about 5'1, and weigh 95 lbs. I'd probably weigh less, but nature blessed me with a very large set of perky, 34dd boobs. And since I live in Southern California, I pretty much always ... Continue»
Posted by salahgabr 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Malini having sex with milkman

When Malini got married to Devender, people who attended their wedding said the match is not alright. Because Malini was a cute short statured, delicate beauty, whereas Devemder was a seven footer, with large limbs fit for a basket ball player or a boxer. Malini had done her graduation in Hindi and Devender also did his grad. and was working in a govt. office.

He liked to eat good and tasty food and malini was an expert cook. But in the bedroom he was a brute. He never talked to her small niceties or did anything by way of foreplay. When he feels like sex, he just sticks his penis into her ... Continue»
Posted by lildudexst 2 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Eyes Wide Slut

You have a slightly difficult relationship with Oscar's s****r Hollie. This is due to the fact that you desperately want to fuck her, and she knows it. She discovered your feelings a while ago when she caught you wanking into a pair of her panties. For some reason, this did not endear you to her. These days her attitude toward you is a mixture of pity and contempt, but that doesn't stop her prick-teasing you mercilessly when your friend isn't around.

You've tried to suppress your feelings for the sake of your friend, but you find yourself thinking about Hollie all the time. In fact, you've... Continue»
Posted by camdogg 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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She Doesn't Like Girls

A few weekends ago I picked my girlfriend (as in, my friend who is a woman) up from the airport.

I met her about a month after she turned 18 and first had a threesome with her and the man we had in common upon our very first meeting. We had been chatting and flirting prior to meeting. We'd exchange pics and share our favorite porn over emails and texts, getting excited for our first meeting in a week or so. We loved the same kind of porn and we talked about how fun meeting up would be with our common lover. That was February 2012 and we are still very close friends…

When I picked her up... Continue»
Posted by Missy_X 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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sex joke


Q. What do a Rubix cube and a penis have in common?
A. The longer you play with them, the harder they get.

Q. What does an old woman have between her breasts that a young woman doesn't?
A. A navel.

Q. What is the difference between a woman and a washing machine?
A. You can bung your load in a washing machine and it won't call you a week later.

Q. Why did god create Adam before he created eve?
A. Because he didn't want anyone telling him how to make Adam.

Q. What is a lesbian's favorite thing to eat?
A. A Klondike Bar

Q. What did the elephant say to the naked man?
A. "How... Continue»
Posted by lonlyold 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Rental contract

My new FWB and I are looking for a place to play. found an ad on CL and this is the response she sent, Hope you enjoy. I'm not sure what to laugh or rub one out:)
Please tell me what yall think!

My lover and I are interested in your room, however before we enter into an agreement, I have a few codicils based on our needs.
1. We only need the room for approximately 10 hours a week, we’re both married, so play time is limited and quite frankly can only handle a few hours of pussy licking, clit biting, cock sucking, ass tonguing, tits flying, ball pounding sex. I get dehydrated from multiple... Continue»
Posted by fun4yallnow 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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My Daughter The Boss

Daughter's can be Fun

My Daughter came home.

We were both ready to go to the toilet by the time I pulled into our drive way, the last stop was for gas and a drink but should have been a full pit stop and it was an hour ago.
It would be a race to the down stairs bathroom and Jane was on the right and closer to the door but I had the house keys. Once I unlocked the back door it would be 'all's fair in love and war', there were two ways to get to the toilet.

I put the car in park and Jane opened her door and fairly jumped out calling to me to throw her the keys. I smirked, 'no such l... Continue»
Posted by chchboy 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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My Daughter The Boss

Six glorious weeks have passed and I feel like I'm still on our honeymoon. Of course we aren't married but Jane is the woman of our house and we do sl**p together, well, some of the time we sl**p and things have just gotten better. Plus there's a peaceful calm about the place as if Jenny approved of our new relationship. I just didn't know it was the calm before the storm.

It started with a shopping trip. The weather had improved and some of Jane's outside games made eating outside fun which meant BBQ food. So, armed with a list we headed to the supermarket. Now, one of my main gripes abou... Continue»
Posted by chchboy 2 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Me and My Bestfriend Jake

This is not actually mine my friend told me it was hers and she said if I can post it here.

My friend and as a lover:


It was one Friday morning, when Jake texted me about going out for some breakfast and have a little friendly talk. He said "Hey Maddy I want to tell you something about your boyfriend Nick". I was so curious about how he said he wants to tell me something about my bf. So I replied "sure there's no big deal about that I guess..." so i sat down the bench waiting for Jake to pick me up after talking to Nick for about five minutes Jake arrived and let me in his car. Jake ... Continue»
Posted by dianneforbes16 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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On The Job Site

We are back in Texas and I have a new job working on power lines. I’m on call most of the time but not a lot happens. Hanging around the house one day and I get a call for a job. Not well prepared for work because I’m the new guy I didn’t think anything of it for lunch. The job I got a call for ended up being a bad one, long hours for a few days. As lunch time rolled around all the guys are talking about what they are going to do. Most of them said something about pizza but didn’t want to leave the job because the parts man could come by anytime. Given I didn’t want to do anything they aren’t ... Continue»
Posted by WillyB30 2 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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monsters world

As an avid hiker, I knew my way around the back hills of my small town. I knew every trail and every distinguishable outcropping for miles. I spent years combing the feet of the Appalachians and up its mighty boulders until I couldn't proceed without actual climbing gear. So, when the day came that I finally managed to get myself lost all I could say was, "Shit."

"Perfect," I muttered quietly to myself. That's what I get for leaving my GPS unit at camp. But I wasn't going to get anywhere by simply cursing my impotence. I set off towards my back trail in search of some sign of life. I knew h... Continue»
Posted by superlantern 2 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Awkward Sexy Time Pt. 2

After I had broken up with my girlfriend, I was left to wander the world of women. I had met a cute woman who was in my work group at school. We immediately started getting along. We had a similar sense of humor and similar relationship pasts. Both of which allowed us to make a powerful connection. Soon enough we were hanging out outside of class; I took her fishing, she helped me pick out my dog. We were inseparable.
We did hit one snag though: neither of us wanted a new relationship. We were both in our "cool down" mode after our break ups and decided to just fuck each other as much as we ... Continue»
Posted by wrkUSA 2 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Nudist and Swingers

We lived in Kentucky and frequented a nudist club in Southern Ohio. We met many interesting people while sunning ourselves. Talking and lots of smiles were common and being naked the talking and smiling were open and sincere.

We both noticed a couple that tickled our fancy (so to speak) and agreed that they might be fun to be with especially since there were lots of eye contact between us as a couple. We found later that their names were Danny and Kathy.

I loved the sauna...so while my lovely, curvy and sex driven wife was laying in the sun I opted for a visit into the sauna. I layed my... Continue»
Posted by buratino66 2 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Best Day

I was doing my cleaning duties, Big cotton pants, tan tights, Skirt and blouse from charity shop. Knock on the door, as usual I went to hide in the bathroom. Its ok you can come out. When I went in the lounge there was wifes best mate H. She smiled as I felt like dying. Oh I see what you mean!! My wife K said lift your skirt! I was close to tears. Look at those panties said H oh dear how sad are those?.

I was sent to shower and shave all my pubes. When I got to the bedroom there was a pair of French knickers and hold up stockings. A nice black bra with inserts plus a red underskirt. I dre... Continue»
Posted by davanamx 2 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Whore Wife Fucked Infront Of Hubby – Part II

My heart beat started to run very fast. I can imagine what condition these men dicks must be. I did not have to wait for long, dharampal touched her plump pussy and found her dripping wet, he said ” haramzadi ki chut kitni geeli hai dekho bhaio ‘ he showed his glistening finger to everyone he said ” aab teri chut phateygi bol kutia gand aur chut sath mein phatwayegi ya bari bari” . Jyoti to everyone’s suprise said” sath mein behan key lodey , aur bari bari sab sey continued.

Listen to this dharampal ordered everyone to make way for his monster, he had approx 9 inches long and 6 inches thic... Continue»
Posted by chandan0707 2 years ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Me and my aunt

It was the last day of my vacation, i was 16 (two years ago). My dad, mom, b*****r, aunty and uncle were getting ready to leave me in the airport, it takes 5 hours to come to the airport from my city. My uncle was driving the van and my b*****r was sitting near him, my mom and dad was sitting on the second row and my aunt and me was sitting on the last row. We started our 5 hours trip. After around 30 minutes my aunt touched my hand and slowly she takes our hands near her pussy. Then suddenly she gave me a rapid kiss on the lips and she put my hand under shirt and with her hand she was touchin... Continue»
Posted by ilovefucking 2 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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True Incident With s****r

What I did was wrong. I know that. You don’t have to judge me, I take responsibility for my actions. I am not going try to make excuses. I simply want to explain how it happened. I want you to understand that it was an accident. It was an honest mistake. I did not realize what my s****r was doing to me until it was too late. I’ve had some time to sort through the events of the past year, and there are so many things I would do differently if I could. To be honest though, there are some things I would never change. Some aspects that a part of me really enjoyed. I’d do it again. My parents split... Continue»
Posted by dineshrocks 2 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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