Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 5

A Foxtail in Natale

so, my friend & i did a sequel… w/George Clooney reappearing as Giorgio.

A Foxtail in Natale

The special holiday sequel to:
A Foxtail in Como

by Mrs. Face
and
roxxanna valencya

It was a bright and crisp winter afternoon in lake country. A layer of fine mist hung over the water as a light snow began to fall over the picturesque village of Bellagio. It was Christmas Eve and the snow made each window emanate a warm and festive glow. As Taylor strode down the tiny meandering streets, stopping to look into each little shop, she remembered why she had returned. Taylor had not been ... Continue»
Posted by roxxanna 2 months ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Sex Humor  |  Views: 122  |  
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KEEP CALM AND GO MATURE -1

It was at the tail end of 2013 that I had my first experience with a mature lady. From then on, I've never looked back.

I'm a 24 year old male from Scotland and I've recently been meeting like minded matures for passionate, no strings attached sex. It all started when I attended my friends birthday party in November. I was chatting to his mum and auntie about careers and holidays for a long while having a few beers and vodkas. The auntie left, and it was at this point the game changed. His mum automatically placed her hand on my trousers and started to slowly rub my bulge. Her face drew cl... Continue»
Posted by edinburghhorse 2 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1462  |  
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Lisa's Trap - Part 1 - Caught in the Spider&#

It all started simple enough. Like many in modern days we started talking on the internet. I can't even recall how or where, although hindsight tells me that it was likely some sort of well thought out plan of her's.

She was nice enough. Innocent. We would chat about movies, video games, the usual semi-dorky internet speak. I would rant about the most recent pains and jerks at my job and she would complain about her latest idiot professor. Yeah, she was a little younger than me, still in college, but it certainly made me feel better about myself to know I was talking to a college girl... Continue»
Posted by LegsLover88 2 months ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 149  |  
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ROAD SERVICED

So I get a call from Patricia I know it her because when I answered the phone I heard high pitched screaming in Chinese she lapses into Chinese when shes upset when I get her to calm down and speak English it seems shes stuck somewhere with a flat tire way out in the middle of nowhere you were visiting some relatives in Colorado and on the way back the car began acting funny next thing you know your on the side of the road with a flat so its Billy to the rescue I find your location on my GPS and take off to find you and a while later there you are looking a little disheveled on the side of the... Continue»
Posted by laceysgirl 2 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 4070  |  
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Kim Possible: Dreams Can Come True - Chapter 3

Kim Possible: Dreams Can Come True - Chapter 3 - After hours

Ron Stoppable was Kim's best friend and sidekick in their fight against crime.

Ron was the exact opposite of Kim. He was the guy that you'll never pay any attention at. He was clumsy and a real time loser, until a few weeks back. He was also in love with his best friend, Kim, but he couldn't tell her. He never had any idea as to how she would react if he told her the truth.

Growing up, Ron thought that he would be what a woman wants. Blonde hair, blue eyes and a great body. Around sixth grade he realized that this wou... Continue»
Posted by crystalwaters69 2 months ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Sex Humor  |  Views: 551  |  
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Masturbation is his hobby, common in retirement co

About 5 years ago I met up with a much older gentleman over the holiday while visiting f****y in FL.
Not cut for a porn movie but at least it was real. I only embellished a few things. Guess and I'll tell you at the end what I exaggerated.

Anyway, this old man, 70, had several hobbies, including one new hobby, one we had in common.
It was early evening, shortly after dinner, and his wife had already gone to bed. I knocked softly, as instructed, and he greeted me in a shirt and bathrobe.
"I always get comfortable in my bathrobe after she is off to bed" he quipped.
He had no hangups o... Continue»
Posted by trevor100a 2 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1741  |  
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ProfNigma Stories #5: If Wishes Were Hornets #6

iCarly/Victorious: If Wishes Were Hornets #6 – Carly

"I wish my life was more like one of those fairy tales."

When Carly woke up, she instantly felt an overwhelming wooziness, and rolled out of bed. She reached for her phone on her night-stand, but she just felt open air. She opened her eyes expecting the bright morning sun to be shining in, but the light was very dim. And as she looked around the room, she realized that this was not where she went to sl*ep.

The room was almost all black and there were videos of iCarly going and lots of clocks all over the wall. Each clo... Continue»
Posted by FrankSinner 2 months ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Sex Humor  |  Views: 209  |  
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Dark Nites

DarkNites I


The slap reverberated around the room. Jason gritted his teeth trying
desperately to keep hold of his temper. Daphne started towards the door but
Jason caught hold of her wrist, his eyes steely.

"You're not going anywhere until we've got this settled. Daphne
glanced coolly at his hand and then back to his face. Then she brought her
foot down on his. Hard.

Jason gave a furious growl and exploded into action. Grabbing her,
he swept her off her her feet and headed toward the bedroom. Daphne
gasped in anger.

"How dare you!", she bit out, starting to jerk and kick as... Continue»
Posted by AndrewBonzua 2 months ago  |  Categories: Anal, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 536  |  
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Festive First-Time


"Oh hi!"
I was greeted by a cheery voice in the street I was walking down, early in the Boxing Day evening.
I looked up to see a familiar gorgeous chubby face.

"Hey!"
I beamed instantly recognising the large plump red-headed beauty.

"It's Danni, I was wondering if I'd ever see you again!"
She chirped, her beautiful chubby cheeks glowing a pinkish hue in the cold weather.

"Me too, I'm glad to have bumped into you."
I smiled, really happy to see her again. She was wearing a lovely wintry fur-trimmed coat,
black leggings which looked like her big thick luscious thighs was about ... Continue»
Posted by LittleMissFart 2 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1172  |  
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A Big One

I lead a pretty mundane life, or at least I did until last week when I had an experience that changed my life.

I'm a digital photo editor and web designer, and for the last few years, I have worked in the adult industry, making web sites and taking/retouching photos for adult entertainment clients. Most of my friends bust my balls and ask questions about my work on a regular basis, "I bet you get laid all the time, taking pictures of naked chicks.” or "Does your dick get hard when taking pictures of chicks?" or "Do I get turned on when a guy pops a boner during a shoot?" etc. In fact, nothi... Continue»
Posted by ndamood4sum 2 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  Views: 2860  |  
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The Hot Affair

Tossing and turning on the bed; she found that sl**p would not come to her, as her mind was full of vivid memories of the days fun they had just enjoyed. A smile came across her face as she remembered each detail of their Anniversary dinner. Choosing a more private affair than most they had decided to go to the local park with a blanket. Once there she realised there was no food. Arching an eyebrow questioning at him he had laughed, pulled her down onto the blanket, lifted her skirt and started to lick and suck her clit. Every so often lifting his head to insert a finger into her wet pulsin... Continue»
Posted by craigus44 2 months ago  |  Categories: Anal, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  Views: 743  |  
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Story behind the "Caught fucking and sucking

I uploaded a two part video that happened in Phoenix Dec 27. As you guys know I visit the Phoenix office atleast once per month. This past Saturday 12/27/14 I was at a local bar. I would disclose the bar name however last time I shared a location we had 2x as many guys at it and the same amount of women. I guess only guys read my stories lol. This is the majority of the conversation some small talk of course is not recounted. Enjoy and watch both of the videos Part 1 Caught fucking milf in parking lot and part 2

Anyway A milf was seated next to me and we made small talk as we watched ... Continue»
Posted by dblacknhou 2 months ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  Views: 4376  |  
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A favour for Misty 4

A favour for Misty 4
You remember I have just been called its late afternoon and I am in the company of her indoors and I don’t know what the silly cow has hatched with Misty, I am freshly showered , recently slept and a worried man as she who must be obeyed has as yet not spoken on the subject of the big fat lady over the road who is a devoted sub and a sex mad maiden who we have rescued from committing suicide!...with me so far or do you want time to re read parts 1,2 and 3? Ok here we go again then.
Realising I have committed the silly mistake [in my defence I had a hangover from the e... Continue»
Posted by alibodge 2 months ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 568  |  
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My Big Fat Farty Friend 3

Hello lovelies, it's Danni here again just in time for Christmas...though there's no way you could fit me down your chimney hehe!

I can't believe how much you all love my silly little anecdotes, but I'm so glad you do and I'm happy to share them here via my lovely mate.

So, when I last left you I was talking about the time I was trapped in a lift and how I stunk the place out before getting rescued by a very hunky very dishy fireman.

I'm going to tell you what happened next.

It was a couple of nights later when Brendan, that was the fireman's name, rang me. I'd just got in from wo... Continue»
Posted by gwensational 2 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 416  |  
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My Big Fat Farty Friend 4 : Festive Farts

I love Christmas. I love the presents, giving and receiving, I love catching up with folks and friends, I love lazing in front of the TV watching movies I've seen a dozen times before already and all the festive specials, but most of all I love the food.

Christmas Day saw me blitz everything on my plate. As is tradition I go back to the folks where mum lays on all the trimmings; turkey, roasted potatoes, mash potatoes, carrots and turnips, stuffing, pigs in blankets, parsnips and of course sprouts.

Not many people like sprouts. They kind of endure them for Christmas because its tradition... Continue»
Posted by gwensational 2 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 153  |  
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Best Roadtrip Ever

Best Roadtrip Ever

Summer of 2014 my girlfriend and I were going to take a trip to California. We had planned just planned this and we were set and ready to roll. She then recently found out about her little cousin. Just graduated high school. Boyfriend broke up with her and had to head to college. Seems like a bad way to end your senior year. No celebration? We were late 20's and weren't much older but she called us her aunt and uncle. So being mature wee decided to take her along. It wasn't intended for a long trip we had already told her yet she decided to take up on our offer. My girlfr... Continue»
Posted by mrlolgg 2 months ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 3725  |  
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Adventures of a bored Dublin wife. Part 2, Joe the

It had only been a month since I fucked Paul next door for the first time.I had fucked him 3 more times since,but I had already grown bored of it.It was great sex,but always the same.Last night Jack came home with what looked suspiciously like a love bite on his neck,probably from Caron his secetary.I asked him about it and he had just laughed in my face.
So today I had planned to fuck Paul,just to get even.But he wasn't at home.His dad said he had moved back in with his girlfriend.Damn.No more sex on the side.Just to make my day worse, there was a leak under the kitchen sink.I had asked Jack... Continue»
Posted by jackelaine 3 months ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 1323  |  
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Cum Shot Party!

Hi, I'm Jason and I would prefer to use this outlet to describe what has happened in my life, especially with my sex life with regards to my wife Beth. I wrote one previous story about what happened last year at my wife's college reunion (see "Her Bad College Days").

Since that weekend, I have done my best to forget what I saw. It had been on a video tape that guys from a nearby fraternity had made of my wife not long after she appeared in a college girls edition of Playboy magazine. The photo of my wife published in Playboy was innocent enough. It was a shot of her turning back, smiling at... Continue»
Posted by yurato 3 months ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  Views: 3536  |  
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Teens 2

Story 2

Crazy hippie junky love, that was all about the relationship between Marry and Alex. They would take every toilet in every bar, every party we went, and every scene with them ended up with them fucking like crazy. Unfortunately she was really a junky in those days so, of course she was slowly changing him too.
One day I was in the kitchen, drinking some beer, when they came to me laughing. Marry sat down, took some beer and light a cigarette. She was dressed in one of those colorful dresses, and a leather jacket that I guess it was her guys’. She looked damn hot. “You know what ... Continue»
Posted by HerbaAlice 3 months ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 645  |  
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Bad Santa: A Christmas Eve (Part 3)

Nick untied Monika, wanting her in a better position. He lifted her naked body up as if she didn’t weigh anything, placing her face down on the cold dining room table, Monika gasping as her nipples touched the cold wood.
“Don’t worry, I’ll warm you up soon.” He took some of the red rope, pulling her arms behind her, crossing them as he twisted the rope from her wrists all the way to her elbows.
Nick pushed the hair from her face as he turned so she could see him, as if she didn’t know what he was going to do. He was going to fuck her in the ass. She could still feel the butt plug in her eve... Continue»
Posted by catherine-belmont 3 months ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  Views: 884  |  
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