Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 5

More makeup sex because it’s awesome

He pressed his lips to hers as he pushed the tip of his dick inside her gently, the whimper she let out made his arms quiver at either side of her head, and she held onto the side of his face so she could kiss him even deeper, while he filled her further and further until she was full.

“Oh,” she pulled away enough to whisper against his lips, “that’s so good.”

A few days before had been their biggest fight yet; real yelling, real hurt feelings, real tears, and it had been the first time it took a while to resolve it. In bed together, kissing, and feeling him inside her, it reminded them ... Continue»
Posted by monster__cock 4 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The game begins

"Ohhh baby, baby, baby, , , harder baby yes FUCK!"

wait what? "FUCK"

This word from my wife rang some bells that got rust all over them in past eight years of relationship I had with my wife.

Yes I come from a conservative society where husband and wife are to be formal with each other. In past eight years I never heard my wife say Fuck while we were making love. It was always silent or only moans. I have to admit that my wife moans real good and at times only her moans can get me to spray it inside her that she describes as the best feeling she craves for :). So this word got me to s... Continue»
Posted by Loballo 4 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Hands-free quasi-orgasm in college

I always got a kick out of the idea of cumming without oral, genital or even tactile stimulation from a female. Just the turn-on of being with her, seeing her nude. I have to admit, it hasn't happened often to me, but I'd like to recount one such type of experience.

I remember it like it was yesterday - I met a girl named Valerie who was two years younger than me at a fraternity party in 1998. We went back to my apartment and started hooking up like crazy. I think it took about 5 minutes for us both to get down to our underwear. So when I took off her panties and she spread her legs there... Continue»
Posted by ILoveBigBush 4 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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you?

































































Awoke the other night like I have so often recently, with a leaky dick straining to burst. Falling back to sl**p was out of the question so I grabbed hold and slowly started rubbing my cock, closed my eyes and started dreaming.....She came into my room and climbed on top of me. We were both naked and our hands roamed freely all over each other. She let out a sweet sigh of delight as I cupped her beautiful breasts, and spread her legs a bit as my hand found its way t... Continue»
Posted by wiedlhowser 4 months ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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The Pill - Part 4

This is the Fourth chapter in the story of my adventures in London, on the day when I took a small pink pill and my face and body transformed into that of a beautiful young woman. However, I knew that I only had 24 hours before the effects wore off and so determined not to miss any opportunity, I had a day of sexual adventures, some planned, some on the spur of the moment.

The story so far: I had started my day in the back of a van, in a multi-storey car park, choosing the outfits I would wear during the day, and discovering the wonders of my new female body. I had then greatly improved th... Continue»
Posted by mallenwc 4 months ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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b*****r & Mother In Law

b*****r & Mother In Law
Summer was right around the corner. I arrive to my girlfriends house to hang out with her f****y.
The only thing different this time is that she will not be there. She is on work duties which
requires her to travel. The same time I get there her b*****r and mother get back from
swimming at their pool located in the middle of their apartment complex. We all step inside and
it wasn’t the hottest point of the year yet but good enough. I noticed their moms nipples showing
just a bit. They weren’t fully erect but you can surely see enough. She was a two­piece
swimming... Continue»
Posted by mrlolgg 4 months ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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The big hips nurse.

This is the story of a young man by which we will refer to him as "Mr. Fernando," well, Mr. Fernando, a 25-year-old was in a hospital, had suffered a car accident, but mild, recuperating in hospital , Mr. fernando met a very special nurse, she referred to as "Heloiza" Heloiza was particularly special, as it was a very dedicated and loving with Mr. fernando nurse, was a woman much older than the young fernando, but what lamaba the young of this nurse's attention was her big hips, which so imagine, had a huge rear, tailor-made for the "Fernando" it was a crazy addict big back, especially if they... Continue»
Posted by fbbain90 4 months ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Actual CFNM from college days

I was friends with two roommates, Katie and Laura, who had an apartment in a building I lived in my sophomore year. I'll be honest, neither of them were very attractive. So I never made a play for either of them, but in frank conversations as college students often have I revealed that I had a large penis. (They didn't believe me (or claimed not to) because I was then, as I am now, a skinny guy.) We all know it's not the case, but they insisted that a guy as thin as me could not have as thick and long of a penis as I was describing.

I resisted the temptation to whip it out, hoping instead t... Continue»
Posted by ILoveBigBush 4 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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Lori fucks her massage guy part 1

Hi! Call me Lori, I'm 29 years old, I'm short, about 5' 2". I weigh about 200 pounds, and I have huge 38DD tits. My hair is long and brown, I've got quite a libido, I squirt, and love anal. Make up your own profession for me, it wont detach from the story. My tale begins 4 years ago.

My boss from work got me a gift card for a massage for doing such a great job at work. I asked if there was anyone that he would recommend, and Todd (my boss) said to ask for Tracy. The weekend was coming up, and I wanted to relax after doing whatever it was I did to get a free massage. (See, it's kind o... Continue»
Posted by magichands1971 4 months ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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TRUTH OR DARE



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Truth or Dare
February 7, 2016 Nerdgasm Stories, Steamy Erotic 1 Comment
TRUTH OR DARE

Matt had the biggest boner of his life. He was sitting in the living room with his friends Andy, Kate, and Stacey, and he was watching Kate give Stacey oral sex.

They’d all gone round to Andy’s place for a drinking session, and after an hour or so and several levels of inebriation, the night had turned into a game of truth or dare. It had started out light enough, with normal boring questions and silly dares, but had eventually turned more adult as the game went on and the drink... Continue»
Posted by hottscott40 4 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Meeting My Old West Hooker Rachel in College


At one time in our lives we all have met that crazy “quirky” girl who made us laugh and was sexy in a funny way. Well I was fifty-seven and taking some college courses part-time when I met forty- something Rachel. She was a very skinny women and kind of plain in a rustic way, no make-up, granny glasses, but don’t get me wrong she still was a good looking woman. What drew me to her was her eccentric dress. Rachel dressed like an 1880’s old west bar girl, long skirts, high laced boots, cotton blouses and funny striped stockings that women wore in the 1890’s. Like a moth to a flame, I just h... Continue»
Posted by captjim51 4 months ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Jane

June 1977:

It is probably plainly obvious this is 100% true, but just in case:

" The following is 100% true"




I used to work on Broad Street in Birmingham, in a building that is now a Travel Lodge. It was mostly
drinking, sl**ping and shagging that went on there, when it was our office, so it was probably a logical step.

Over the road was a pub, named at various timed the Granville and The Westward Ho, but it is now O'Neills.
This was the place that the staff drank at lunchtimes, and after work.

If you knew the manager it meant you could stay all afternoon, when t... Continue»
Posted by DrVonWankenstein 4 months ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Nicest person with whom you were sexual

Aside from my wife, who is the nicest person I know, I thought it might be fun to recount (and hear our stories) the nicest person I was ever sexual with.

I was in college at the time. It was my senior year. I met a girl at a fraternity party who (for the sake of anonymity) had a name that started with "M". She was 2 years younger than me, and I could tell she was pleasantly plump. By no means obese, but a bigger girl yet with curves in the right places. She was with a girl who had a rare skin disorder in which her pigmentation became very splotchy from the merest exposure to the sun. It wa... Continue»
Posted by ILoveBigBush 4 months ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Ever have sex with a woman with hair on her ass?

Guys - ever have a girl with hair on her ass?
A couple of years ago I was watching Dr. Oz and a young woman had the courage to admit a condition she had whereby her ass cheeks had hair growing on them. Dr. Oz went on to say that this condition was far more common than anyone in the audience would care to admit and that it was very brave of this lady to come forward. He gave some tips on treating the condition.

At the time, I was reminded of my college days because I was once at a bar and despite the relative darkness I was able to look down the back of a girl's - Natalie was her name - jea... Continue»
Posted by ILoveBigBush 4 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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the Horny Month with Anna and Dave - Part 2 ( 5:00

( before you read this , I just want you to know that you might find some errors in the text , after all ... I'm not a professional )

Anna wake up early on the next day ... she made sure she wear her pretty PJs that reveal her breasts-vine and pants that can easily slide down ... and of course , cute panties and no Bra ! ... the first step was to prepare a tasty meal to win his affection , and even a perfume for when she get close to him ... it was too much work to make everything perfect so early in the morning ... all what is left now is for Dave to wake up ... assuming that the br... Continue»
Posted by NSFW-Dealer 4 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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the Horny Month with Anna and Dave - Part 1 ( the

( before you read this , I just want you to know that you might find some errors in the text , after all ... I'm not a professional )

this is a story about a girl named Anna ... her mother passed away when she was very young , so she never really got the chance to know her ... Anna's Dad work at a huge company that keep him busy all the time ... so out of boredom , she gained interest in Porn through the internet ... at first it was just for fun , but soon after ... porn was the only thing she can think about ... and whenever her Dad isn't home , she would watch tons of sex videos , ... Continue»
Posted by NSFW-Dealer 4 months ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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The Saving Grace of Chatrooms

Have any of you - males of females - ever been on a date that did not result in sexual activity only to go home, get online, and hook up with someone else that very night?

Now that I think about it, it's probably not the rarest thing in the world. In fact, I'm sure many of you have some great stories of rendez-vous that came about from that exact fact pattern.

I certainly have had this happen to me and I'd be glad to share one of my experiences. I went on a blind date with a woman mutual friends set up. I don't even remember this woman's name, but I remember finding her mildly attractive... Continue»
Posted by ILoveBigBush 4 months ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Sarge revisited!

Given recent events (and the fact that it has been frankly a disgraceful length of time since I’ve blogged) I think it would be a good opportunity to update you all.
Please do not be mistaken in assuming that because I haven’t blogged, I haven’t been ‘playing’, as that it not the case … at all! Also please don’t think that if you were one of those… erm… ‘players’ that you were in anyway ‘unblog-worthy’ because that may not be the case either (… may not).
Unsurprisingly, one of my ‘current’/ongoing visitors is ‘Sarge’ (you might remember him from ‘hands like shovels’). As you well know, 99%... Continue»
Posted by unassumingmistress 5 months ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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How to Fuck a Woman with a Large Ass

For those of you who read my account of my heavenly experience with Kit in 'How to Eat Out a Woman with a Big Ass,' here is an account of the next time we rendez-voused and had intercourse.

To reiterate, Kit was a large, very pretty woman with an especially large ass. She also had extremely bulbous labia majora that completely shrouded her labia minora. It was difficult, but by no means impossible to access her clit and opening with my tongue, but as my previous post revealed, it all worked out - between cunnilingus and 69-ing, I made her cum three times and she lovingly drained my balls wi... Continue»
Posted by ILoveBigBush 5 months ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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The Basketball Game

My wife and I were all excited our favorite team was playing for the conference title. We got our shirts own with the school logo, school colored sweat pants, fixed our drinks, and turned the tube on. We were not picked to win but had been playing well in the tournament. My wife has a large frame about 5"6" tall, beautiful 36DD tits, 29" waist, and 38" butt. She handles her weight well at 155 lbs., she is very strong. To look at her one would guess her to be 25 lbs. lighter.

The shirt she wearing was one of mine that buttoned in the front. She stretched it across the front with her large t... Continue»
Posted by crabber 5 months ago  |  Categories: Group Sex, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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