Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 111

Top Clues that your Woman Is Cheating On You

Short of walking in on your wife or girlfriend doing unspeakable things with another dude, there's no foolproof way to know if she's cheating on you. But there are clues — thing is, you probably don't notice any of them.

But we know two guys who do — in fact, it's their job. Between them, Christopher Paoletti, president of Infidelity Investigations LLC, and Tony DeLorenzo, co-author of The 28 Tell-Tale Signs of a Cheating Spouse, they have about 45 years of experience hunting down cheaters. So we asked them to tell us what sort of behavior is a tip of that a woman might be cheating on you.
... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 5 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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My naughty s****r cumming into my bedroom at night

When we were young my s****r would sneak into my bedroom at the end of the hall and would. Curiously pull back the blanket and take my dick out of my under wear and look at it and fell it. I was about 16 she was 14. I had sex before and she never has but I did see her with moms dildo in her pussy before! She would come into my room almost every night and play with my dick. I would move a little and she would duck under the bed. She figured I was sl**ping. So after about two week of this she got a little braver and put her soft lips around my cock for just a second and when she did it again I r... Continue»
Posted by Richard234 5 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Honeymoon with my cousin

HONEYMOON WITH MY COUSIN (1)
It was a hot sunny day, my school exams were over, we friends celebrated,danced& enjoyed ourselves.It was evening time when i reached home.To my surprise i found my cousin s****r opening door.
Jeniffer how come are u here? ,i said,
where is my mom?, jenny
relax,my parents dropped me here & went with yours to enjoy weekend,she said.
but........,i said. don't worry go and get fresh,she said.

While i was taking shower i heard opening sound of my door,is that u jenny?
yeah its me ,she said

At the dining table i noticed her wai... Continue»
Posted by Matt5 5 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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MY FIRST NUT!

WHEN I WAS 13 I USE TO GET IN TROUBLE ALOT. SO MY MOM SENT ME TO LIVE WITH HER AUNT. SHE WAS OLD SCHOOL..... WHEN I MEAN OLD SCHOOL SHE WOULD BEAT MY ASS FOR ANY LITTLE THING I DID OUT OF LINE. WELL THIS ONE TIME IT WAS EARLY Saturday MORNING. I HAD A MORNING WOOD THAT JUST WOULDN'T GO WAY! SO I STARTED TO JERK IT...... BRINGING A NOT SO QUIET MOAN FROM MY LIPS................ NO WAY SHE HERD ME. SHE GOES OUT ON THE PORCH AND DRINKS HER COFFEE. I WAS REALLY GETTING INTO IT......WHEN I HERD A SCREAM!! YOU DIRTY LIL FU#KER!! SHE YANKED ME UP PUT ME OVER HER KNEES. I WAS ALREADY CRYING NOT THI... Continue»
Posted by forsaken1034 5 years ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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sharp exit nearly.

i was approached to attend a swingers party,
i agreed and took a girl,
little did i know id been set up,
as soon as i stripped off i was blindfolded and put in a dark room,
i realised i was not alone,
and a dog started licking my balls,NO I SHOUTED,
i got uptight and angry,
then the blindfold was taken off,
and i was in the middle of 3 fit women oiled up and mine to pleasure.... Continue»
Posted by tricepio 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Ghostfinger-----totally non-porn, but funny as hel

This is the mostly true story of how I lost my finger at work in a tragic yet humorous accident. It is up to you the reader to decide which parts are true, which parts are humorous and which parts I'm just blowing smoke up your ass.

It was a Monday like any other Monday, but this Monday was special. It was Sewards day. Just to refresh your memories, Sewards day is celebrated (in Alaska anyway) for the purchase of Alaska from those Godless commies bastards, the Russians. Trust me when I say they are kicking themselves for letting it go so cheap. In Alaska it is widely celebrated mos... Continue»
Posted by joewaterford 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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8 Ways to Feel Closer After Sex

Take a moment to think about what you and your guy usually do after sex. Chances are, it’s sl**p, eat, or flip on the TV. Not exactly romantic, especially considering that the few hours afterward are one of the best times to bond. “When you orgasm, hormones are released that make you feel more connected,” says clinical sexologist Rachael Ross, MD, PhD. “Take advantage of that by doing things to prolong the feeling.” But that doesn’t mean intense conversations or eye gazing—little gestures can reap big benefits. Try these tips tonight.

1. If you’re hungry, forgo ordering a pizza and instead... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 5 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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What the Hell

Well Came home from work early the other day and caught my bitch cheating for the second time.. And this time with her Uncle.. No shit well he was married to her aunt at one time no bl**d there but still nasty as fuck if you ask me.. But thru it all I kept a level head cause we have a 1yr girl together...and Was not about to ruin me being in her life because her mother is a stupid whore.. My first thought was to snap and kill them to be honest.. But That would serve no purpose.. I instead did the right thing and was very polite and killed them with kindness.. They did me a favoe if tyou ask me... Continue»
Posted by steven6977 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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f****y values

One time i was staying out of town at my cousins place We decided on big night out on the tiles as we hadnt seen each other for a while.

Me my cousin and a few of his footballer mates, hit the clubs
we was all bang up for a good time ,
we were dressed to kill and on the hunt for girls.

A few hours into the night the drink was flowing and we eneded up in a really steamy dance club in west end ,

i was at the bar buying some more drinks with my cousin while we were laughing and exchanging stories of what would like to do to a particular girl in the club

We have always been competi... Continue»
Posted by dannyboy190 5 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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Porno Night


Lying in bed she said: shall we watch a porno? What, really? I asked, not sure if it was some sort of trap, wary from her Columbo routine by now.
But she was really, not really sure, but really all the same. Ok, but I’m not sure if I know any websites. She laughed – such an absurd lie could not be taken too seriously.

Up popped the main page. It’s a bit much she complained. These are just the categories, I said, we haven’t even got to the proper bit yet!
I scrolled down the categories. Ok, so we’ve got interracial, mature, storyline, female friendly – what’s that? she asked. That’s wher... Continue»
Posted by Josef_K 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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'Hump a Tree', A Girls Diary Memories

We all sat around as Kimberly carved away on the tree. We were all in our early teens, a group of girls lost in a hormonal wilderness, neither here nor there, just fantasying about sex, or our concepts and ideas about what sex was all about, and about cocks, we always talked about cocks, and we giggled, and vacillated from thin to thick, long to short, but always having our own personal craving.
Someone screamed, 'OMG Kim', and there was another scream and laughter. I went across to see what all the commotion was about, and what confronted me brought a smile to my face.
Kim, shortened from K... Continue»
Posted by MarieL 5 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Group Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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My second one.. This was with my social..mam

I already shared with u guys my expirience with my science..mam and this s with my social mam.. I liked her..very much...
She s in her 40s .married but din have a c***d :( :)... but truth s that she s dam sexy...i always daydream at her..and result is fail in my exams.. So i get a chance to attend her remedials..around 10 students accompany me in her..class.. Oh i forget to say her character ,she s very strict ..she use to debate for all the topic.. So i know if i could get her in a sexy argument then i can win her.. .. I was waitin for a rite day..i said all my friends that lets bunk the re... Continue»
Posted by Michaelzoron 5 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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First time trying on a condom...

I was in gym class as a freshman in highschool, and we had the ever present awkward class where the boys and girls separate to learn about our sexuallity. (although as like right now it seems everyone had already explored theirs but me) and the learning set today was on safe sex. we learned about all different kinds of birth control from condoms to pills to "pulling-out" to diaphrams. all of it was very awkwards and so-far useless to me in my sexless life. so the assignment when we got home that day was to try on condoms they passed out to the class. surprisingly enough, the school didn't skim... Continue»
Posted by MDvirgin 5 years ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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my uncles girlfriend

my uncle and his girlfriend went away on holiday for 5 days my uncles girlfriend was big woman huge tits i had the hots her 2 days had past i didnt really have my auntie in mind until i decided to go for a piss about 3 in the morning when i saw a pair of her worn black lace knickers on the floor i couldnt resist it i tried to get it out of my mind but my auntys pussy was stuck in my mind so i picked them up and started to smell them it was lush never thought i would even come remotely close to my uncles girlfriend crotch but i was so good i cum within seconds i did this several times through t... Continue»
Posted by benbois78 5 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Jenny and Tanya in old Amsterdam - last part

With Jenny in c*** from too many orgasms, Pete tied up tough Tanya on his wooden low table and trashed her properly as well. During coming she only beeped:
"Beep, Pete Peterson, peep, ... I pee ... beep ...".

Seeing her peeing Pete doubled his efforts. She shouted so loud that ol´ Pete collapsed ... but Jenny woke up!

Jenny untied Tanya. Kicked Pete awake. Told the old man: "More!"
And she presented him his arms. Poor Pete was left without defense.

He accepted his paddle and the Polish whip, called "cat-o-nine tails" in English - in Polish "na ostry seks" and came back to duty ... B... Continue»
Posted by petdyke 5 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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Grudge Fuck

My wife and I have been divorced for a few months and we divide our c***ds custody every other week. This weekend my ex was going out with some of her girlfriends to a local bar that was only a few blocks from my apartment. It was the middle of the night when I was woken up by a loud pounding on the door. Checking through the peep hole I could see my ex dressed like the slut I knew her to be weaving back and forth d***k off her ass. I opened the door quickly before she could pound on the door again and possibly wake our son who was sl**ping in his room. I opened the door and she staggered... Continue»
Posted by cockednredy 5 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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just a fantasey of mine

ok, this is the hotty half of fall guys couple, so this story is from my point of view. its just a fantasy so far.
darkness. the soft caress of silk on bare skin. the subtle sent of bergamont in the air. i lay tied to the bed, soft silk scarves pinning my arms and legs wide apart. another scarf covers my eyes, darkening the room to nothing even though i know candles burn. an intricately tied series of more silk scarves harness my body, tightly holding me like a lover. the knots are placed just so, and just tight enough that they tease and torment my erogenous zones, but offer no relief.... Continue»
Posted by fallguy74 5 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor  |  
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Anathema Device










Anathama Device


Anathema returned to her class satisfied that she had got her own way yet again .

Anna was used to getting her own way. She dominated her older s****r Meg and her younger s****r
Janet, She even dominated her Mother Meg or so she imagined.

The telephone rang at Meg Browns house . Meg answered almost immediately .

It was Martin the Principal at Hope High School .
Martin White was the nephew of the bank manager who had owned the Mansion on the hill and had been the deputy Principal when Meg was at school.
No one knew except for ... Continue»
Posted by clearly 5 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor  |  
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Tiger's Tale




My name is Tiger. I'm a ten year old male cat. Erin is my 18 year old human pet. You can see our pictures above. I'm the good-looking one. If you want a bigger picture of me to print out and frame, then here is the link xhamster.com/photos/view/339950-5156795.html

When i was a kitten, my mom ran off with some tomcat and left me to fend for myself. One day i was walking home to my alley when i came across Erin. She was selling lemonade on the sidewalk. Erin won ... Continue»
Posted by teengirerin 5 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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Let Her Eat Cake (an afternoon doodle, a fond memo

Let Her Eat Cake
The association of food with sex is ancient and wondrous. At its simplest is such as the time honored route to the male heart through the stomach. But what young man could realize that it might work with a woman?!
Once upon a time he and a delicious colleague were engaged in that exquisitely awkward dance to enchantment when the ankle sprained, the boat ran seriously aground due to unfortunate inadvertence. Whatever caused the sublimation of fire to ice is unrecalled if recognized then. That it occurred was as clear as painful.
Nothing sufficed to thaw, no entreaty to c... Continue»
Posted by iansearchof 5 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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