Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 104

Crack Addict prt. 4

You wanna do what ?!!

I want you to lay down on your stomach. I'm gonna rub this vial of baby oil on your ass cheeks and then I'm going to rub my dick in the crack of your ass until I cum. Preferably, I'd like to rub said cum all over your ass cheeks with my dick.

Man, you crazy ... Crazy as fuck.

But I got money.


I pulled a loose wad of cash from my pocket and gestured towards the prostitute. She giggled like an old hag and reached for the money.

you sure that's all you wanna do right ? I mean you aint gonna slip inot the booty hole or nothin and cla... Continue»
Posted by mondotoken 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  Views: 675  |  
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Confessions of a token nigger ....



Ten years ago I happen to find myself at one of those uncomfortable pseudo liberal parties in the hills of Hollywood where people usually went to get not-so-quietly d***k, abuse prescription meds and talk about endless unfiltered politics ..
I was there but for the good graces of my clique, a ragtag group of pirate Nixon’s if i ever saw one ..

It was a view into a world I had little use for but could not pull away from .. I had somehow come to take up the "token Black guy" position in this group and the cost of my vicarious entertainment at... Continue»
Posted by mondotoken 4 years ago  |  Categories: Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1461  |  
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Oral Fixation: Combining Two Things I Love

Recently I saw a couple of photos posted on xhamster of a chick with a banana shoved half-way up her twat. Got we very hot and I saved them to my favorites if you're curious to see them.

That image took me back several years. I had this girlfriend who let me fuck her with a banana on the kitchen table. Naturally, I fucked her with my dick in just about every room of that house, but having her buck-naked, spread-eagle on the dining table with a banana in her (fucked her with a carrot a few times too) was quite a hot thing to see. Especially the time my room-mate who was supposed to be ... Continue»
Posted by hangingout1984 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 180  |  
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In Flight Fuck

"If you're the kind of guy I think you are," he said. "Then I
know you'll accept this token of my gratitude."

"A simple handshake would suffice," I joked, as Tommy pulled down
my pants. My cock was rapidly rising to the occasion.

*********************************************************
It was a good thing I was awake. The plane was about to land and the flight
attendants were checking everyone. After all my crazy dreams if one of them
had nudged me while I was sl**ping I know I would have screamed like a little
girl.

When I glanced to... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1265  |  
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NO BOYS ALLOWED

Mehek introduced me to her friends, showed me around her town, and helped me
settle in and acclimate to my new life. We were cousins by bl**d, but friends,
and pretty soon best friends by choice. We hung out together, had the same
group of friends, and shared secrets, everything that best girl friends do. She
even told me about the night she lost her virginity to her boyfriend. I must
admit that hearing her describe how it happened got me really sexually aroused,
and that night while Mehek was asl**p, I masturbated for the first time. I only
used my fingers and didn't even have an ... Continue»
Posted by thehornybabe 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Lesbian Sex, Sex Humor  |  Views: 5469  |  
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Sexual Participation

Image of perfection
Object of an affection in sexing
Fantasizing freaky positions of you in submission
Pushing pulling twisting and moaning
A Place where I could store my erection
Splendid features
Tongue kissing fucking
Look up cause I got mirrors on the ceiling
Reflecting your ass bouncing silly
Soon as you come in right away
If you’re willing
Splay your legs open
Game played by 2
My sexual motivation
Got you yelling spots for me to do?
Amazed by the way you grind
Just for fun
I bet ill make you cum 61 times
First before insertion let me heat it up
Beat it up when ... Continue»
Posted by Emeze 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 166  |  
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The Wild Ride In The Air

The metal table was cold against my skin. My hands and feet were tied up and I was wearing a blindfold. All around me I heard voices, and the sound of people unfurling something they held in their hands.

That's when the whipping started.
******************************************************************
Flying Sucks!

I don't mean suck in a good way either. Flying sucks one hundred year old man asshole skank. The only thing I hated more than flying was living in the Southwestern USA.

"It's a dry heat," everyone says.

"Bull fucking shit!"

... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 4 years ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Fetish, Sex Humor  |  Views: 478  |  
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What to do For an Encore

"Back in med evil days Gay sex was more in the open."

"Behold Hector, someone with their head and arms
caught in the stockade. Let us make haste
and part his ass cheeks forthwith!"

"You go ahead Orville I will go to the village and summon
the brethren so we can have a proper gang bang!"

*********************************************************************

The room was filled with cigarette smoke. But that wasn't a problem for two reasons. One we weren't at work and two I had started smoking again to help me over the estrogen roller co... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  Views: 692  |  
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Our Own Show

Nikki was the first to blow. S/he caught me square in the eye.

"Oh! I'm cumming," s/he shouted.

That caused a chain reaction. Francesca splashed me on one side while Zaza got me on the other.

************************************************************************

"Fuck!' shouted Nick in frustration. "Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!"

"I'm OK!" I assured Dennis.

"Now what do we do?" asked Zaza.

And with that one of Gigi's favorite movies popped into my head.

"Come on everybody! It's like what Judy Garla... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  Views: 397  |  
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Kelly Bundy's Saturday Morning Surprise Part

Saturday morning came early for the younger Bundy f****y members; Buck as
usual was humping Marcy's poodle; Bud had just screwed Amber and she was
staggering back to her aunt's house butt naked and tired; Bud has now
crawled
back into bed to cuddle up with his other warm piece of ass for the
morning,
he had started out fucking her, but duties called for him to service Amber
and to keep her pussy happy.

Kelly sl**ps soundly as usual as she normally gets back home around 2am
from
one of her boy friends, where she usually gets screwed in the back seat of
their car, or gets ... Continue»
Posted by Kazron 4 years ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Sex Humor  |  Views: 6480  |  
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mrs fielding sees the snake

mrs fielding nearly fainted when she pulled down my jeans.she didnt believe me when i told her that i was huge.her face was a picture.all the emotions in a couple of seconds.suprise,delight,panic,bewilderment,amusement,lust.at one point i really thought she would faint.when she recovered her composure she began to stroke the length and girth with both hands.

now lets get one thing clear from the start---having a huge cock isnt all its cracked up to be.firstly women think its great to have a massive cock inside them but most cant fit it in.well mine hasnt been fully in one yet.its also diffi... Continue»
Posted by tonguehello 4 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 2059  |  
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Like Judy Said

Unbelievable!

The infamous Hammer Man is none other than my ex gay lover I knew
up in Boston. One day he up and and disappeared on me only to
turn up here! How insane is that!

Hank was more surprised than I was. He totaly forgot his lines.

"Is that you, little soldier? Looks like you've gone trannie on me."

"I'm a transvestite you ignorant fucktard!" I shouted a little more
than I would have liked. Perhaps the Estrogen treatments were having
an effect on me.

"Hey, I'm sorry!" Hank apologized. "I would have said good-bye... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1389  |  
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accidentally licked girlfriends s****r

So I had been dating this pretty blonde girl for a while. She was 5'1" and maybe 100 pounds. She was very petite but very pretty. She had a younger s****r that was about her size but was even prettier. She was a gymnast so her body was really tight. We would go see her perform and I'd always fantasize about her tight, firm body in that tight uniform. It was Christmas time her entire f****y was staying at her house for a few nights. I was there with them. We had to sl**p all the guys in one room and girls in the other. My girlfriend loved having sex where people could see us or w... Continue»
Posted by hrdnhrny20 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 1054  |  
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First Date

It's 6:55 in the evening and I'm sitting on a marble bench in the atrium of the Chicago Stock exchange. In five minutes you will walk through the sculptured glass double doors that lead into this magnificent lobby. You insisted on meeting me here rather than picking you up at your hotel. You mentioned something about a "grand entrance". I have been here since 6:30 (a lady should never have to wait on her e****t.) I look at myself in one of the many mirrors that line the hall. I cannot see that I am shaking but I feel as though I am absolutely vibrating with anticipation. I ... Continue»
Posted by Sillswede 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  Views: 1793  |  
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Meating The Hammer Man

I turned and slowly struck a pose in profile while Dede panned around my long hard on. "Have any of you seen Hammer Man?"

"Nope!" answered Cessa.

"Oh well," I sighed. "Do you suppose while we wait one of you could, (dramatic pause) Fuck me up my ass?"

********************************************************************

It was hard to believe that this was the same place I was in several weeks ago. Gone was all the casual joking, and the laid back atmosphere. It was replaced with all kinds of tension and a strictly business attitude.

Th... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  Views: 195  |  
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aunty takes good care of me(part 2)

aunty betty gives me her towling robe to wear.no point in getting you back into clothes especially with those casts.i put the robe on.it has her perfume and body smell.chanel perfume .dont you just love that smell.she puts on a white t-shirt dress.throws a chain belt round the middle.am i in heaven or what?.she looks like a goddess.

she helps me to the kitchen and i sit on a counter chair.i watch as she prepares the salad.steak and salad .you need to keep your strength up for what i have in mind she giggles.not quite the way i had things planned.but we will make do.

i ask what she means... Continue»
Posted by tonguehello 4 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 2776  |  
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Playing Doctor

By the time we got to my place I was sober enough to remember the promise I made to Dennis. When he came out from the bathroom I offered him a seat in my recliner.

"Time for your lesson," I announced grabbing for his big hairy penis.

"Actually," replied Dennis. "I just want you to do me like you did on the set."

"Well in that case," I answered. "Pardon me while I slip into something more comfortable."

********************************************************************************
As fast as I could I changed in the dressing roo... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1521  |  
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my girls asshole !!!

i am with my girlfriend six months and she is bi. she has a great body and firm breasts!! one thing that i did not like was her asshole.. it was hairy and i said to her that i did not like it and she said it was to awkward to shave that area and she asked me would i do it!!!! i asked her would she get her female friend to do it and let me watch!!!she was hesitant at first but then she quite liked the idea!! a weekend came and her bisexual girlfriend came over ... i popped the bottles of wine and one word led to another and before i knew it her girlfriend said she would shave it for her!(the wi... Continue»
Posted by drakesin 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 1195  |  
75%
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my girls asshole !!!

i am with my girlfriend six months and she is bi. she has a great body and firm breasts!! one thing that i did not like was her asshole.. it was hairy and i said to her that i did not like it and she said it was to awkward to shae that area and she asked me would i do it!!!! i asked her would she get her female friend to do it and let me watch!!!she was hesitant at first but then she quite liked the idea!! a weekend came and her bisexual girlfriend came over ... i popped the bottles of wine andone woed led to another and before i knew it her girlfriend said she would shave it for her!(the wine... Continue»
Posted by drakesin 4 years ago  |  Categories: Anal, Mature, Sex Humor  |  Views: 548  |  
80%
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Jane and the Belly Dancer

Jane and the Belly Dancer

We resumed fucking and for the first time in my life I began to feel sick to my
stomach while having sex. It was time to resume my self coaching.

"This is how I'm gonna someday make THE BIG BUCKS! Just a few more minutes.
Oh shit look at those tits bounce! The way she's moving her legs. OMG OMG OMG!

***********************************************************************

I gazed into the full length mirror inside the dressing room and admired
my new makeover. There was fresh make up on my face which for the first
time ever, included f... Continue»
Posted by loriannthetran 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Gay Male, Sex Humor  |  Views: 805  |  
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