Sex Humor Porn Stories
Page 103

What women think while having sex

Some women have now revealed what really scores with them between the sheets.

Single comedian Shazia Mirza, 34, said that some of her friends revealed that during sex they are mentally writing a to-do list, remembering clothes they have to wash, what they've got to buy at Tesco's or those shoes they love in Selfridges.

And some women even think of men they secretly fantasise of.

"A friend of mine, who really loves her husband, told me that during sex she can't help thinking about all the men she secretly really desires, like Jeremy Beadle and Jeremy Paxman," the Sun quoted her as s... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Women Like To Cuddle After Sex

If you want a repeat performance from your lady friend, it might be a good idea to tap into your sensitive side and step your cuddle game up. Psychologist Susan Hughes said:

“Females placed an overall great importance than did males on all five items measured: intimate talking, kissing, cuddling and caressing, professing their love for their partner and talking about the relationship after sex. In contrast, men placed more importance on gaining extrinsic rewards after sex.”

And these extrinsic rewards include cigarettes, booze, etc.

So what is to be gained from this study (that survey... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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What Attracts Women

According to some studies, 3 out of 10 men are can attest that they really understand women.

The remaining 7, you ask? They are out in the haystack finding needles. This means that almost 70% of the men population in the U.S. contends that whatever they do, they still could not figure out how to understand women.

For this reason, men are having a hard time to figure out what attract women sexually and romantically in a relationship. 6 out of ten men attest that women are so unpredictable that what they thought women are attracted to, they suddenly realize in the end that it is not the ri... Continue»
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What women want from men

1. When we talk 'listen', it shows us that you care about our feelings.

2. Men should be smart enough and understand that not all our bad moods are connected to PMS-ing.

3. Guys, developing an EQ (Emotional quotient) would help. That however, does not mean that they need to cry at the drop of a hat, it just means you need to be more sensitive towards us.

4. With women communication is the key, so try and talk to us often.

5. Here are some traits we wish men would display – chivalry, making an extra effort with our friends and f****y, because we do the same!

6. Cook for us o... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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One-night stands more useful than you thought

Many surveys have suggested that the quality of a relationship is better for individuals who wait for things to get serious before having sex, in comparison to the those who become sexually involved right at the start. However, this new study found that a woman who is involved with a friend is 44 % more likely to stay committed and as for the men, the likelihood increases by 25%. If the same people were to get involved with a stranger or acquaintance, the odds increase by 30% for women and 43% for men.

"To have a meaningful relationship out of a one-night stand is absolutely wishful thinki... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Seduction Of Young Nurse

I am 22 years old student. I am studying nursing and in order to help my widow mother financially, I work part time at the house of Mr. and Mrs. Sharma, a lovely couple. Mr Sharma is in his forties while Mrs Sharma is much younger. Her husband met with an accident and has suffered concussion and broken ribs and many deep injuries. Mrs Sharma is a gorgeous looking woman who is modern minded.

My duty is to look after her husband while she is out most of time shopping or with her friends. I often give sedatives to Mr Sharma so that he can have a peaceful sl**p. I once saw a collection of porn... Continue»
Posted by jpjai007 4 years ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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Dumky Time

Dumky Time
Or Cunnilingus in….F Minor
It had been a long, challenging day in a week of same, and they were physically, mentally, and emotionally drained. There being nothing for it but the good malt, music, and the pleasure of each other's company, they repaired to his place. Into the second drink they were feeling renewed and warm.

Sitting together on the couch they easily, naturally began kissing. When the music ran out, she asked to hear the Dvorak they'd talked about recently. When he'd put on the disc and returned to the couch, she asked ... Continue»
Posted by iansearchof 4 years ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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In the Toolshed - Short Story

Edward Caine, 42, electrician, divorced, lives without a partner since five years. He likes to sit on his front porch and to watch the school girls on their way home. It fascinates him, just to think about their blossoming youth and the trials and disappointment they are growing into. So it's no real wonder where most of his erotic fantasies are coming from:

I walk into the back yard as I hear faint voices coming from my garden shed. But as I approach it to find out who is playing in there the doors suddenly opens. I manage just in time to hide away around the corner: it is a young bloke ... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Squashed out - Short Story

Jodie Marie, 22, freshly engaged with a car mechanic, is a simple woman. She likes to cook, to cuddle, and she certainly likes to make love. And because she has a boyfriend and seems to be well maintained by him, her fantasies are sometimes reflecting the realm of the unknown, the appetite for something new - and include sometimes even a woman:

I'm loosing the damned game! I hit the rubber ball harder, but with every mistake I make her grin grows broader. She is a friend of my mother, about her age, but still fit and not bad looking, but she is a bl**dy lesbian, playing with all the young... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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The Accident - Short Story

Cindy Rose, 27, a separated insurance broker without c***dren, is disillusioned by her heterosexual relationships. She tried many a spiritual path to learn to accept her personal male energies and to get aware of her feminine beauty. She knows by now, that lust isn't bound to a single gender and that love can be found only by accident! She wrote to me:

It was a stressy day at the office and everybody just picked on me. Somehow frustrated I slam the door and lock the car. A short glimpse into the letter box reveales: only junk mail again! »One day I would gain enough courage to murder that ... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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The Stranger - Short Story

Suzie Yong, 25, an erotic dancer in a night club, had encounters with men more than enough. She maybe experienced a lot of rude and humiliating behaviour, so she pulls herself back into her snail house for her fantasies: She wants to stay in control, and she doesn't want to be screwed - her Asian peach flower is is not for grabs and not for sale:

I'm always horny and I never wear a slip. I enjoy the unrestricted freedom of movement and the fresh air fanning my peach. Especially on Saturday nights I dress very lightly to entice my prey. I stand at the back window of the crowded bus from th... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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The Mermaid - Short Story

Johnny Stout, 33, a life-long bachelor and a plumber by trade, is a very cheeky one: His element is the water and his love belongs to the mermaids of the deep! And whenever he dreams on his water bed at night his wet fantasies dive into the unexplored caverns hidden under the surface, the disturbed matress gurgling the sound track to his emotions:

Like in all those steaming hot summer nights when I can't find any sl**p I go for a refreshing swim. Quietly I climb over the fence of the local pool and listen out for noise. There is somebody already in the warm water, floating around at the f... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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The Petrol Station - Short Story

Todd Wood, 23, an interstate truck driver, experiences a lot of lonely nights, when his erotic fantasies are his only companion. He doesn' has a fetish with virgins, but as he says: There is an unfading attraction in the innocence of women, and you have to be extremely sensitive to be the first man in their life! And this one is his favourite fantasy:

It's two o'clock in the morning as I pull into the petrol station, not for gasoline but for some inspiration to quench my physical desire before a couple of hours of sl**p in the van. The little road shop seems to be unattended but open. I br... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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The Punishment - Short Story

Lucy Sky, 24, happily married with two c***dren, had a very straight religious up-bringing. She learned already very early in life, that as a true believer you have to condemn the sin but to love the sinner - and she definitely seems to love both of them equally. She is a conqueror, a temptress and a teaser, but only in her erotic fantasies:

»You were masturbating in the dormitory again - s****r Noris heard you! How many cautions did you get already?« »Two, Father Anselm!« »And: do you confess?« »Oh yeah, Father Anselm, I do?« »So: all my prayers were in vain? You still are a naughty woma... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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The fucking Cowboy - Short Story

Sue Miller, 26, a vetenerrian student in a country town, is still searching for the right relationship. She is well built and she knows that. But she still can't accept the fact that her body does attract men more than her sharp intellect. That's why she plays hard-to-get and therefor gets it hard! And that reflects clearly out of her sexual fantasies as you see:

I'm angry on my late way home. My new boyfriend kicked me out of his car after an argument. He said, that I was cold and selfish - that it was all my fault! The fucking prick! Men are all the same! I know how stubborn I am, and h... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Flying High! - Short Story

Mona Lindley, 29, single, international sales manager, travels a lot. She doesn't like men too much, despises kissing, is disgusted by touching dicks and hates warm sperm trickling down her thighs. But she uses men for her sexual satisfaction, and should there be none around her at the moment, she endulges always in her own erotic fantasies!

The golden sun sinks tired into the soft bed of clouds and the veil of the night draws over it to keep him warm. The contant vibration and the numbing hum of the heavy jet engines are lulling my senses. I made a bit of small talk with the guy next to ... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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The new Secretary - Short Story

Mary Monroe, 21, secretary, single, enjoys one-night-stands more than a continuous relationship. In her vivid fantasies she uses her body to entice and encourage men to a spontaneous encounter without responsibility. Making love with the same partner for more than once seems to bore her and to hinder her for the all so fascinating new adventures:

I'm a bit nervous on the first day of my new job as a secretary. The manager that introduces me to my duties is young, handsome and very lively. With his dark brown eyes he scans my whole body, seems to undress me already in his mind. He stares a... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Five Games - Short Story

Virginia Ross, 21, unemployed, would like to be a ..., but the men in town are all too familiar or then too ugly. So she has always an eye on the good-looking tourist that appear from time to time. And even when her game of seducement isn't always working out, in her erotic fantasies she never looses a good hanky-panky. Here is her favourite one:

I'm just hanging in the half-empty hotel bar, I'm sipping my last beer as this handsome young tourist suddenly comes in. He spots me instantly and offers me a drink. I'm very grateful and offer, to play a game of pool with him. I'm very good at p... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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The Hitch Hiker - Short Story

Jack Straw, 35, single forever, sales-man for stockings, lacy lingery and condoms, travels more miles through the lonely country than any one of us - it is his job! He doesn't meet many women on his long and dusty way through the outback, but he certainly longs for the once-in-a-lifetime encounter with a lady that will fulfill all his secret dreams!

Here I am once again on this endless and winding road through the deserted country side. The six cylinder motor of my old station wagon is humming comfortably under the broad bonnet as I ride along with seventy miles an hour. I am traveling li... Continue»
Posted by sushicook 4 years ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  
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Good & Bad Fucking Lessons From Porn Movies

In addition to its ability to cheer you up in times of need, porn has some useful lessons to impart to its viewers. On the other hand, some of these are hideous faux pas that every man should avoid like the plague -- or gonorrhea, for that matter. Then there are the great lessons porn has to offer us all.

Pornography is generally a healthy staple of any man’s life, but beware: Not all porn is helpful to your sex life. Watching porn with your girlfriend can be a great way to learn about each other and have a laugh. Although you'll probably learn most lessons on your own, if you're lucky, yo... Continue»
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