Sex Humor Porn Stories


It happened to me sometime this week, with one of the finest women I`ve ever had. Milf, but a little bit younger than me, happy mother of a c***d, but with a great body and a pussy tight as hell. That was a “wow!” for me. I mean, after giving birth to a c***d, many women become more fat, or at least the pussy is not the same.
This particular one I had just llloves the cock. She sucked me, and altough she couldn`t get it all the way `til the throat (this made me feel very proud about my cock), she sucked it very good. I had to stop her, because I almost cumed, and I wanted to fuck her too.
I ... Continue»
Posted by roadrigusantus 1 day ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  


Days went by after the episode with which I ended the first part of my story, without anything interesting to happen.
Then came this hot sunny day, it was in the month of May…maybe, I can`t tell you for sure. All I know is that, in that day, I was in a really bad mood. For me it was just one of those days when you don`t want to do anything and don`t want to see anyone, and especially, you don`t want to go to work. But I went eventually, and maybe it wasn`t such a bad thing I did…you`ll decide in the end.
In that day came a moment when I went in the same office, with my same female collegues ... Continue»
Posted by roadrigusantus 2 days ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  


This month I met with one of my female ex-collegues I used to work with and….wow! so many memories came in my mind…
First of all, you must know that, in my working place, there are very few male employees. I mean, for several years, I was the only male on the floor where my office is. Then, you must know that a lot of my female collegues (some of them being real hotties) are married women or just involved in long term relationships, VERY unsatisfied by their men, so you can imagine that, with one like me, being in my 20`s, with a nice future in front of me, for lots of them being the only one... Continue»
Posted by roadrigusantus 2 days ago  |  Categories: Fetish, Sex Humor  |  


I read this profile online one day and it quoted an article about sucking dick and swallowing jizz. I wish that I had seen it many many years ago. I could have shown it to my wife as an inducement for her to give me head, like when we were single and she was trying to persuade me to marry her!
The author is unknown to me, however, I think it's worth sharing, so here it is:
Depression: According to a recent survey undertaken by MIND among people suffering from depression, many felt much better after sucking a Dick. This is because Dick juice contains a protein that the body converts into se... Continue»
Posted by bobapple 2 days ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  



My name is Frank, Frank N. Fickner, and I am the revenant of a race under occupation of martian invaders, and hopefully to be the saviour of humanity!

Brought back to life as a means of reversing the martians' conquest of the planet Earth, I was reformed as a patchwork of several people long gone, but my mind - and thankfully my cock - are still my own. I was also implanted with a secret weapon to use against the martian pod people, which we will soon come to.

Once I had a life, back in 80s and 90s Los Angeles. I was a por... Continue»
Posted by dantheman1980 3 days ago  |  Categories: Celebrities, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  

The birthday party

It was a favour to Sally that started it all, she asked me to drop off Dan's birthday present. Sally would be at work. So she gave me the key to the flat, the present and a card, and of course instructions for what to do. And I did follow the instructions as far as I could, but fate intervened, more of that later.
At about six pm I met Sally, and went on to the flat. I let myself in with the key and had a look about, in fact I had a good nosey. Dan is quite a hunk and It was quite exciting to wander round his empty flat, I even opened a couple of drawers and had an imaginary conversation ... Continue»
Posted by celcus 8 days ago  |  Categories: Anal, First Time, Sex Humor  |  
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The First Time Together

The first time I was fortunate enough to pull down his pants, as clear as day I remember gasping in ecstasy 'You never told me you were so big '. Not only was it a generous size, but a handsome one at that, of really good girth and just perfect in my eyes. I felt like I'd stumbled across some treasure and now that I found it, X would mark the spot and it wouldn't go out of my sight again.

'I don't know when it would have come up in general conversation darling during the time we've spent as friends'. 'Well we've stepped over the friendship zone now and the only way to go is forward' I tho... Continue»
Posted by kinkyirishcouple69 9 days ago  |  Categories: First Time, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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The Day We Caught the Train - Part 2

Edinburgh Waverley

The taxi pulled up in front of Kate's house and we stepped out into the shadow of the house. The air was a little chilly and Kate had picked up a light jacket from the hooks by the front door and carried to the taxi. She commented on how cold the air was but once she'd stepped in to the sunshine she warmed up immediately. I was walking a few steps behind watching her very well proportioned arse, hips and legs sashay casually to the car....and enjoyed it very much. It's nice to observe from a distance what you ... Continue»
Posted by Evile_DNA 9 days ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  

The Day We Caught the Train - Part 1

Edinburgh Waverley

It was a bright morning and sun flooded the fields at the back of Kate’s house and spilled through the windows warming the dry air and carressing Kate's skin. She was preparing herself for a day out in Berwick and awaiting her Master’s arrival, and put on a loose fitting silk dressing gown. A cool autumn breeze blew in through the open patio door and evidence of this could be seen through the thin dressing gown as Kate’s nipples hardened.
Upon hearing the doorbell she unlocked the front door and Dair, walked ... Continue»
Posted by Evile_DNA 14 days ago  |  Categories: Masturbation, Mature, Sex Humor  |  

There Ain't No Option-B, Motherfucker!!! (Com

So I was staying over with a friend down south for a week. Barry lived with his mum and she had a nice big house a few miles outside of the city in a nice rural patch. Essentially that week came to consist of drinking, playing videogames and sl**ping a lot. I couldn't get over just how peaceful the place was, not to mention how lush the house and the guest bedroom was too!

Teresa was stunning in her mid-forties and her only son, Barry, had grown accustomed to the fact that she was staying single and playing away or having company whenever she saw fit. That apparently wasn't much, but it did... Continue»
Posted by dantheman1980 15 days ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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Morning Sex w/ My Friend

Stef was going through a messy breakup. That on top of everything else. Her dog just died, she was having trouble at work. They say everything happens in threes - the proverbial "They" who are never of any use!

About Stef, briefly. I've known her for about four years. She's 22 and built big enough to kick your arse and she will if she has to, trust me. I like strong women and she has a bit of a young Lucy Lawless look to her. yes, we've already fooled around in the past.

Well, I tongue fucked her before we were interrupted and then our relationships seemed to just keep getting in the wa... Continue»
Posted by dantheman1980 15 days ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor  |  
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On that day, I was reading stories in iss in the morning and I listened sweeping sounds at the outside of my house. I was so horny by that time because of the stories effect. I understood that its my maid sweeping outside. I dont have any intentions on her upto then.As I read many maid stories, I wanna try my luck that day.

So, before she enter home I started acting as if am still sl**ping in my bedroom. My dick which is of 7 inches is in its 90° because of stories effect and can be seen through my shorts as there is no underwear inside. She came inside and started sweeping hall and then my... Continue»
Posted by fukkerguy 16 days ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  

I Fear There's Nothing I Can Do....Yeah

Anyone who has ever received an emergency text, knows the feeling of being concerned that something bad has happened, especially if the text was as vague as this one. "Come ovr. @ home. Need ur help!" was all the message said.

The text was from Sally's friend, Julia, who also happens to be my wife's parents' other daughter. I was concerned, as I said before, so, I hopped into my car, and drove the eight-or-so blocks to Julia's apartment. When I got there, her front door was open. I closed and locked it carefully, so that whoever was in there would have a little more trouble getting out. It... Continue»
Posted by LickerLicense 16 days ago  |  Categories: Anal, Sex Humor, Taboo  |  
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Friend's Wife

There are a couple of things you never expect to hear your friend say, "Would you be willing to fuck me wife" is probably at the top of the list. But that's exactly what my friend Brian asked me as we were walking down a fairway playing golf last week. My wife and I were back home for Thanksgiving and I was spending some much needed time away from the f****y when Brian dropped that bomb-shell on me. Brian and I have known each other for about 10 years, and the only contact I have ever had with his wife is when she answers their phone or a few minutes inside of their house when I was picking hi... Continue»
Posted by Mrbigdick2014 17 days ago  |  Categories: Hardcore, Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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a post, a flash, and a friend. A story that was in

Inspired by actual events.

One night, I was meeting some friends in another town about 30 minutes north of me. I had some extra time on my hands, so I decided this would be a good opportunity to post something I’d be looking to try for a couple months, just needed the right time to do it.

I posted an online personal in a casual encounter site. All I wanted was to find a female willing to flash me, then we’d drive on. A quick, anonymous encounter. She’d tell me where to go, and what she was driving and I’d tell her when I’d be there. I posted my ad, and got on my way.

The first fe... Continue»
Posted by cvilleguy74 20 days ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor, Voyeur  |  
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An Honest Lair ( w/ Jamaican dialect)

A thirty something year old woman should have enough confidence and life experience to not only be herself but know what she is about regardless of the heat lusting after her, which is exactly what I am. I am realistic when I find myself in any kind of relationship, men don’t tell their woman if and when they are giving bunn, so at times I might just end up doing my thing and know how things would be if the shoe was on the other foot like it is most times; fair is fair. Three years ago for about a year I was in a relationship with a nice guy, but like all relationship this one had its p... Continue»
Posted by jamaicanjizz 20 days ago  |  Categories: Mature, Sex Humor  |  

I and robby

When David and I moved from the city to far out in the country, his fears of me being alone on those nights he had to work late, or the times he had to travel began to make him feel uneasy about our decision to move. He tried to get me to agree to a purchase of a gun, and for me to take shooting lessons, but that was entirely out of the question. Still his fears lingered and he did convince me to allow him to get a dog for my protection.

The first place we checked out was the a****l shelter. I figured if we were going to get a dog, why not save one from being put to sl**p. David was quick t... Continue»
Posted by stif266 20 days ago  |  Categories: First Time, Interracial Sex, Sex Humor  |  
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The hotblond takedown

“Is it your woman?” one of the ex-cons asked me
“I understand she’s something special”
I said “She’s a total submissive nymphomaniac fuckslut”
“Can’t get enough of men “
He said”Well, I’m sure that after two hours with us she had enough”
“We’re gonna break every rule with her,I hope it’s okay with you”
I said”She’s good looking so take it easy on her face”
“Othervice” I said”You can fuck,slap,whip and beat her as much as you want”

I had never seen so much muscles and it was a little bit scary.
There were only ... Continue»
Posted by lenjan 22 days ago  |  Categories: Sex Humor  |  
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negitave 50 shades part one

The day I felt nothing wanted nothing. I looked upon craigslist found an ad that I thought would
fulfill my needs, my wants, ,my desires. It asked for a slave, one to fulfill his needs. I wrote

an email saying I am the slut you are looking for. We spoke we made plans to meet up, at whore

motel paid by the hour. I was told to pull in the garage, remove my cloths and crawl like a dog

up the satirs. Nervouse as all hell pulled in, saying what the hell removing my shirt pacing then

my pants and panties. putting on my collar putting on the things to bound my legs. Finally puting
... Continue»
Posted by Chrissysummer69 24 days ago  |  Categories: BDSM, Sex Humor  |  

Renee - The Fiery Rose

(This story about a man saving a girl's life and that girl repaying him seven years later after reconnecting with him.
Not: This is not a taboo story.)

It was seven years ago..

Seven long years on an oddly cold summer night. If you asked me to remember everything about that night, I'd be at a loss, but the one thing I will remember. It was the night I met her. I was walking on a bridge over looking the lake down below. I remember thinking to myself, "Why put a side-walk on this long ass bridge? No one except my dumb-ass would walk it!" It was also that same night I had my final fight wi... Continue»
Posted by epickdickingtime 27 days ago  |  Categories: First Time, Masturbation, Sex Humor  |  
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