Sex Humor Porn Stories Page 3
SURFING THE WEB WITH A TWIST.
I love to surf the web my favorite sites are the porn sites I just love all the women that put there photos on these sites and even there videos,
I love the amateur’s section, as these are real people and not models,
This one day I decided to do some surfing and as always you get popup messages
The usual ones are sign up for free sex and then the camcorders one’s shag a local woman in your area,
The usual crap I just want to find some good wanking material somebody wife or a sexy teen,
I was clicking on the amateur sites when I noticed this new si... Continue»
A short kiss on the lips. A quick exchange of phone numbers. Off she went on the bus. Or should I say: climbed d***kenly onto the bus?
I didn't expect much of the party where I met her. She was hilarious and there was enough silliness in our conversation to suggest some sort of attraction. The neighbours complained and we were already pretty d***k and so everyone left. I asked for her number which she gave me. I jumped for a kiss on the lips. She kissed back, looked at me and off she went. Not enough attraction, I thought to myself and made myself on my way home.
Of course, the phone ... Continue»
Role-play time again! Fetishist fantasy only, sixth-form student over the age of consent, nothing else implied. Apart from that, zip down, get a grip and let's go.
It's after-school time and we've been exchanging some really filthy texts all day, mostly anatomically unlikely or downright unhygenic, and we're both in need of some extra-curricular activity before going home. We arrange to meet in the park, it’s got lots of secluded areas but there are always people passing through so there’s an element of danger should we decide to get up to anything naughty … which is why we’re there reall... Continue»
My name is Roy this is my first story so please forgive me if i do any mistake any where
Our f****y moved to a new big house in the state it was big but not so big at least i and my s****r had separate rooms to ourselves i was the elders of the c***dren and at that time that this story happened, i was 20 while my s****r Kim was 18 years.
In our new neighborhood, i had no friends but my s****r had this friend called Kit who lived next to our house. Kit was the same age with my s****r she had a very sexy body which i always a
This all started when an xham member sent me a link to a video of a women flashing the plumber she called in to fix her sink. I found the video very arousing, to the point I wanted to do something similar and a few days later whilst window shopping I noticed a women in a bicycle shop testing out a bike. What caught my eye was how the sales rep was looking at her ass as she mounted the bike. It gave me an idea, I was coming back the next day for a bike!
Like any normal human being, I of course fantasized about random sexual liaisons with various fantasy men. But fantasy and reality are tried... Continue»
Hi like all my stories on this site they are all fantasy and pure fiction and not real events but thank you for looking,
My name is Sally and I’m married to John my husband, He specializes in psychiatric patients, who have been put away in a psychiatric hospital for most of their life,
We have been married for 10 years,
He has worked very hard in the past 10 years to get his position at one of the top psychiatric hospitals,
We are both in our thirties so life is great our sex life has always been good as we both like the same things in life and do so much together as a couple,
I went on a holiday to Turkey a couple of years ago as a single traveller. The hotel was an all inclusive in Belek near Antalya. Madge was on the same flight and also the same transfer to the hotel. I noticed she was also a single traveller on the transfer coach.
Madge is a bit like a stick insect, 5'2, natural blonde, skinny almost boney but there was something about her that grabbed me. I am a single 60 years man who has had enough of younger holiday slappers. I can't say that I wasn't looking for love or a relationship, I was and had been for several years but at the time I was just intere... Continue»
so... a friend & i wrote this for another friend's b-day. she wrote the clean stuff & i wrote the smut & yes, a date w/Costner is like that.
A Foxtail in Como
George Clooney is the biggest dick in hollywood, and he proved it in Taylor's ass.
by Mrs. Face
It was a glorious spring day in lake country. The light breeze cast ripples over the bright blue water making it sparkle in the sunlight. Taylor and “Giorgio” (as the locals called him) were enjoying an afternoon bike ride through the village of Bellagio after spending a lazy morning at Clooney... Continue»
The Goddess of Fertility
I used to work with a guy called Melvin. He was a lovely, happily married man with one
problem in his life. His beloved wife and he were finding it difficult to conceive.
I was I think 25, he'd have been about 40.
They began a programme of IVF at a private BUPA hospital not far from our workplace.
Each of them had to go on there from time to time, for the removal of her eggs, and
of course, for him to provide his "sample" for the procedure.
He used to tell me this in a very matter of fact, jocular fashion. He had to pop out
or take an early lunch a... Continue»
My name is Emma, and there is no greater feeling in the world than to have a man's skin against my own. I'm a big girl that loves to fuck, I want to play and have fun, but tired of these foolish boys that claim to be men. You can only take so much of the pics and the camming, I don't want to hear how sexy I am, you need to show me and make me feel it too, damn it I am not going to take your word for it that's all they are empty vacant meaningless words you think would evaporate panties but in the end it just goes in one ear and out the next, it doesn't last, unlike a caress or an embrace tha... Continue»
LOOK AND I WILL SAY WHEN YOU CAN TOUCH
It was nearly a week later before I saw anyone which was strange as they never seemed to be there much considering they were a f****y I was beginning to think they were a very strange f****y,
I mean she put on a show for me, I then saw her with another man while her husband watched and the took part,
And now they were never at home and what’s happened to the son I haven’t seen him since they moved into the area very strange,
I’m still hoping to get to fuck her myself as it would seem that she likes to tease and then enjoys fucking othe... Continue»
YOU CAN LOOK AND I WILL SAY WHEN YOU CAN TOUCH
Hi my name is William and I’m 16 years of age I live with my mom,
I prefer to be called Billy instead of William so that’s me,
We live in a nice part of town and have a nice house my Mom works and so does my dad, as an only c***d I get to be on my own a lot and so you could say I’m a bit of a loner at times,
I do not have a girlfriend but I do have some mates that I sometimes go around with and we do a lot of sports together at school so do not have much time for girls,
It all started when I got home from school one day and I noticed... Continue»
“Are you sure you want me to do this? I can still give you a hand job instead.” Dana‘s voice was whiny with anxiety. Her thoughts kept dancing between exhilaration and guilt. I wanna do this. I’ve never done this before. Is this wrong? Is he just weird? Is he weird in an ok way? Matthew gave her a guilty look. His eyes were so round and sincere that she felt her heart washed over with puppy fuzz. I can’t say no, her brain concluded. They just walked into the living room. The apartment was already cleaned up. Matthew’s roommate would be gone for the weekend. This Saturda... Continue»
Something was wrong with Astrid, and Hiccup had no idea what it could be. Ever since last wash day she has been far friskier then ever before. Hiccup couldn't turn around without Astrid barreling down on him, ripping his clothes off and doing every dirty thing under Sol's sun. She would show up at the forge and basically pounce him; or the one time in the mead hall while everyone was eating supper, she stealthily slipped under their bench and gave him the most amazing blow job ever. Hiccup couldn't understand why she was suddenly so... un Astrid like.
He wasn't overly concerned, it was Drag... Continue»
Remember that episode of WWE Raw when all the wrestlers dressed up as basketball players, well this is the behind the scenes story.
Inside of the women's locker room at the STAPLES Center, the locker room for
the most part is vacant with the exception of the stunning, irresistible,
mischievous identical twin s****rs, Brie and Nikki Bella. Brie Bella, dressed
in a short red skirt and a tight fitting red top, sits at the make up counter
inside of the locker room, looking into the mirror at her reflection as she
applies blush to her cheeks.
"Hey Brie..." Nikki, dressed in a... Continue»
I awoke still feeling the effects of yesterday's threesome. I gazed to my left and saw Sarah lying on her back sl**ping and I looked to my right and saw Melissa facing away from me as she slept soundly. I looked down her body and I saw her fine ass beaconing me. I felt myself getting horny again.
I quietly snuggled up to her and I put my arm over her to hold her close. She gave a quiet and sl**py groan as I did so. She began to stir and she turned her head to face me and she gave me a smile as she then gave me a loving kiss. She felt my cock press up against her ass and she knew what ... Continue»
A lazy, inattentive manc***d marries a hot, nagging wife. It's a television trope, a device that allows for lots of storyline hijinks. The characters' sex lives are barely implied or even nonexistant on screen, but what if:
10. Temperance Brennan, BONES
Bones is no one's doting, submissive wife. She is unemotional & unattached; early in the series we learn that she enjoys casual NSA sex. A frequent diatribe from her is that the anthropological need for monogamy is outmoded. Bones would take a lover & coldly admonish you for if you were upset by it. Temperance is also one of the more like... Continue»
A long time ago, I had the dubious honor of working as a cook at Sugar’s. The club was billed as a gentlemen's cabaret, although even back when the neighborhood was more prosperous the joint was always a bit seedy. Any building without windows and smoking allowed inside can’t help but turn into a den of ill repute.
The kind of place you’d see a midget cock slapped in the face by a giant lemon horse dick.
I myself was just another face back in the kitchen, where I started as a dishwasher and slowly learned how to cook everything the club had to offer. For the most part we were faceless, ... Continue»
It happened in 2008, I was 25, working in Chennai at a multinational firm, and residing at Adyar. It was a individual house, with the landlord f****y on the ground floor, and me alone on the 1st floor. They were a Tamil f****y, parents Mohan (52) and Sudha (45) and daughters Vanita (25) and Harita (21) <<all names changed>>. Mohan was an executive with a big firm, heavy smoker and drinker; Sudha, his wife 5’4”, above average looks, a slightly dusky complexion and little plump for her age. Vanita was married and living with her hu